irl

dedicated to my online friends

hello,

it’s the start of another week. i have piles of work to do. a rental studio sitting unused. all i can do is cry. big wells of grief are surfacing for me.

my dad says, “i miss you” and i cry for an hour.

i realize i have been holding onto people for fear of not being stable without them.

and i’m not stable.

i’m a mess.

i rely on people to feel grounded, safe, and self-assured. i rely on responses to my writing and art. i rely on messages from re-posts and texts saying, “hey. how are you?” i rely on a your memes and your barf face emoji’s to feel less alone in this mess.