I ran out of meds and hit send.
me and white supremacy. a call to action
Ya’ll my adhd meds make me stay on track with life. I’ve been out for a few days. I find myself staring into nothingness and just losing track of time. It’s really frustrating. So I found some extra’s my husband wasn’t using and was able to get most of an essay written yesterday (not this one!)
Prior to taking the meds that morning, I wrote a highly animated short essay to my community addressing the massive blind spots they had, from a higher-than-though pedestal I crafted for myself. I was enraged at their ignorance and determination to push against a desperately needed life-saving service in the form of a Safe Injection Site.
Winnipeg is the last major city in Canada to have this treatment. Conservative Governments have been against them from the start and have actively manufactured data to prove they are not working and therefore should be discontinued. So of course the Conservatives living near me are believing their data.
I call this the data wars. And it wasn’t till all this in-fighting arose that our NDP Government realized they needed to host round tables or information nights to help members get on board.
Needless to say, I hit “post” to our 5000 member Facebook group and immediately regretted it. I was hot-headed, coming in with guns blazing. I was basically picking a fight when that is the last thing that would be helpful at this point. I got push back almost immediately and took the essay down. I felt so humbled and shocked at my impulsive, emotionally driven words. Was that the adhd or was that inexperience in managing strong emotions?
I’ve been co-hosting a white affinity group for the last few months. We started a study/accountability group on zoom where we focus on the 28 days of Me and White Supremacy book by Layla Saad. These discussions have spilled out into our main parenting support groups. It’s become everything we talk about now. It is the highlight of my day when we openly talk about dismantling systems of oppression.
One of the key ways things in this world will shift towards a new direction is through white folks taking accountability for their actions. Meeting in small groups and looking at the mess of their own biases, worldviews, and actions. It’s time to talk openly about our toxic cancel cultures, our abusive forms of power and control over anyone we feel is below us. We need to be in continual reflection and movement. We cannot rely on BIPOC to hold our hands.
[spoiler alert] I watched WICKED the film recently. I was blown away. I know it’s written by a white dude, but the cast and directing was stunning and powerful. Elphaba, the main character, asks her “bestie” at the end of the movie to go with her on the broom into battle. Glinda (the “good” witch) considers it and then declines, choosing to stay with the corrupt and fascist regime of the Wizard. Of course that is a simplified description. But at this moment in history, it really is that simple!
Do we, as white folks, want to get on the broom stick? Do we want to ride with our relatives? Do we want to carry the weight together? Do we want to walk, crawl, rest, cry with our sisters and brothers? It’s a big choice and much more difficult for those with a lot to lose. But before I get back on my own pedestal, think about how happy you are. Watching the horrors take place all around us. Is it worth giving up and staying in comfort and denial?
I just want to encourage everyone to pick up a few dismantling white supremacy books and also start or join a small group where you can work through these hard topics with others. Topics like white privilege, white fragility, tone policing, white silence, white superiority, and white exceptionalism to name a few. This is the work we have been asked to do. If you are feeling overwhelmed or confused focus on this.
If you are interested in joining or starting a group, feel free to message me and I can work with you to get started.
Peace.
I’m sure many of us will post “hot-headed” essays this year. It’s a natural reaction to what’s happening in the world and we need an outlet for anger.
I have been outraged and disappointed by the number of my white immigrant friends who’ve said Trump’s agenda won’t affect them, or “I’m just keeping my head down for the next 4 years” or “We’re not the immigrants he’s after.” These are folks mainly from Europe—France, Germany, Spain, Russia, Ukraine, UK—but also Canada, who came to the US just like I did with my family, for better jobs, to escape whatever ‘restrictions’ we felt we lived under, for an adventure. The level of “not my problem” I’m hearing is horrendous. So I’m afraid I don’t hold out much hope of many of the white folks I know doing the work necessary—not until their lifestyle is in danger anyway.